Thursday, 29 October 2009

FILM 4: MY BIG FAT GREEK WEDDING - Oi, four-eyes!

My wife is really angry at this film. She's angry because the romantic man-lead only seems to like her because she's put some make-up on, and they don't have any chemistry, and all he seems to want to do is get off with her in his car. She's also cross because the woman went to his school, and took him out of his class. If he's a teacher, how come he's got time to hang around travel agents leering in at the employees? Probably because he was one of his teachers' long and frequent holidays. Take that!

Personally, I'm anticipating that by the end of the film she's going to have put her glasses back on and he'll love her for who she is inside. I hope so anyway. There's a sinister anti-glasses agenda in this film, and I'm very cross. Contact lenses are shit, and I'm not pushing wafer-thing glass into my eyes for anyone. Especially you, Tom Hanks. I expect I'll be seeing more of you later.

The baptism scene was funny, but I really, really wish that Matthew McConaughey was in it.

Did you know that he can't stand up by himself?

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